Wednesday, 5 May 2010

Motherly love

My mum called tonight. She's not one for apologies or directly confronting issues, but I do think tonight was half way there.

She basically jumped right in, asked me how I'm feeling, then sounding surprised when I said "fine". (I feel like it's a sin to saying I'm feeling fine by the way.. and then I worry that something's wrong because I'm not feeling ill)

The "apology" came as something along the lines of:

Mum: "I didn't want to get too excited at the weekend because it's still very early"

Me: "Oh, I know and I know lots of people who've lost babies early on"

Mum: "yes"

Me: "Did you have any miscarriages?"

Mum: "No"

Me: "Oh, that's good, coz I think they can run in families (what?! I just completely made that up!!)

Mum: "humm"

Me: "Oh well, I suppose you just have to keep in mind that if it does happen at this stage then something was probably wrong anyway."

Mum: "yes, exactly, not meant to be. When do you see the Doctor next then?"

Me: "Next thing is my 12 week scan, they're pretty hands off"

So, as you can see, I basically made all my mother's excuses for her and her lack of emotion at the weekend. She probably won't mention it again, but I least I know that she's not completely heartless.

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