When you realise... Your friends are boring

There were days of fun, laughter, drunken stupidness and late night girlie chats. Then your best mate marries someone so bloody boring, he could win an award for it.

You forgive her though, after all, she's always craved marriage and well, at least that will make her happy and your drunken girlie chats will no longer end up in tears over whether he'll ever ask her... I mean 28 is soooo over the hill!

Things are fine for a while, she plans her wedding, loses a stupid amount if weight and then falls into wedded bliss.

The fun continues, even though you almost imediately fall pregnant. You still talk and share, even though she has no comprehension of how much of an impact having a baby has had on your life.  She's still working hard in her sales role and is stressed all the time. But she seems happy.

Then SHE has a baby and the world changes.

She changes.

Completely.

No laughs, no jokes, everything is focussed on the baby. The obsession of the "august baby" not being an issue becomes a major issue only solvable it seems by Baby Mozart, Flash Cards and In The Night Garden.

You put up with it for a while, expecting the novelty to die down, but it doesn't.

22 months later you go on holiday together and you soon realise that your best friend can talk about nothing but her son and being a mother. When he will sleep and eat and STILL what shitting pattern he has (probably due to his copious allergies).

She is like a martyr, trying to do the "mummy" thing faster and better than me. It's not a competition to me, but to her I think it is. If she wants to win, I'll let her, I am happy that my life is fulfilling and I'm pretty confident I don't bore people.   I certainly have fun.

My best friend is a shadow of her former self. In fact, a shadow is generous. She's more like a ghost, one that I'm not sure I will see again.

Marriage has changed her. She doesn't open up to me. She has lost all her confidence.

Of course, I want to help her. I'm sure she wants her old self back too. But every time I go near the subject of her, I get the feeling she thinks I'm patronising her. I can't win.

She wants her family unit and her boring husband, so I guess I'll just have to wait on the sidelines, play my part and hope that one day, I might get my best friend back.